Showing posts with label Fri-dad. Show all posts

Fridad

Here it is, folks. Can you smell it? It's the weekend!



For some, it's a day out and a day off work. For others it's the shift that we will gladly take to get a day off during the week. For me, Saturday is work day (and beer night) and Sunday is family day.

Any who, last week I promised a vamped up new look to Fri-Dad. I don't do fancy fonts or design, heck it's not even my damn blog. I decided to switch it up to give me plenty to think about to make for a little more bite sized reading. Consider it a bathroom break read (if you poo or piss kinda quick) or a cheeky read whilst on long drives (DISCLAIMER: DO NOT DO THIS! YOU MAY DIE!)

So here it is, feed back Laura for all thoughts and suggestions.

Topic - Ashya King

For anyone following the papers, some will have read abut the boy from Portsmouth (my hometown) suffering from a tumour who was taken from hospital by his parents who were desperate to provide the best treatment for his condition.

The parents left an assuring video discussing their situation, the treatment they received from the hospital and staff and a plea for police to call off their search so they can help their son.

I took the time to re watch the video and consider the situation. It's certainly something out of a TV drama series or film. What I was left with was..."you know what? Go get 'em".

Understanding that the father was ready to sell the house and pay for the desired treatment abroad is fine. If you feel that strongly about your own child and know that you would go through hell and high water to help your child (that's pretty much what you signed up for) then go for it,

Of course be aware you are subject to abduction, because the child has just had surgery and selling your house would not make it easy for you to provide for all your family after the treatment was paid for. You are taking a grave risk, but, sometimes you have to take it, you want to take it.

Parents do put themselves through stress and struggle, just to give their children every opportunity possible to know that one day, it'll all be worth it.

After their recent release from prison, I hope their wish I answered. Ashya receives the treatment, they remain a family after the treat of having Ashya taken from them and they can proceed as the loving family they've shown they are.

Off-topic - Smart TV

Some of you lucky ones, who are as fortunate or more than me have the pleasure of Smart TV. Some have it built into your TV, use a smart box (e.g. Now TV, Roku, Chromecast etc.) or simply plug the laptop into the TV. Those who don't, I'm going to let you in on what you can enjoy.

With access to things such as catch up TV, Netflix and YouTube to keep on top of all the viewing I demand. Up to date series, events, trends...it's something I'm glad I could do at little cost.

Being a dad and wanting to be a writer, I find it pretty hard to make time, so it's been a saviour staying on top of things and even having research material at my fingertips.
It offers a vast range of things to watch as a family and saves things I might have missed while busy.

The biggest downside I've found with it is it's lack of use. Netflix is a saviour, it's what I reach for for entertainment, but with it used so infrequently, the same as the television and the Xbox it's worth considering how much you will use it.

If you're thinking of doing this, please let me suggest a few things:

Pick the right smart tv - if you do choose to have a smart tv, be sure it offers all the functions you desire (same with smart boxes). They can be more expensive than regular tv's so do plenty of research.

Pick the right box - Now TV offers catch up tv, but only sky services which can be monthly payments. Roku offer pretty much the whole lot, just make sure they work best with whatever tv you're plugging it into (some work best for smaller tvs).

Chromecast - A great cheap alternative to a box. Only catch is you cast from a phone. Tablet or laptop. Also it works for a few apps. BBC, Netflix and YouTube mainly. If you think you'll use them a lot, I surely recommend this.

Can't afford a box? Try your laptop - A laptop is always another great option for those feeling the pinch and want to enjoy things on a bigger screen. The world can be your oyster...depending on the connection. Laptops require either HDMI (preferred) or a VGA and an audio lead. Macs require specific leads which can be hard to source (depending on if you can make it to an Apple shop or not). Doing this can offer so much, the only pain being navigating it all from your laptop.

Top Tip - Zip lock bags

Laura showed me something I found quite impressive to avoid a certain struggle we have as parents,

Max loves puzzles and can lose parts or get them mixed up quite easily. Rather than keep struggling to find the right pieces for the right boxes, she developed a scheme to keep things convenient and avoid marking the pieces,

By putting the pieces in a zip lock bag (you know the ones people used to wrap their sandwiches because they were too cool for cling film) we could keep on top of pieces.

It made for less mess, stress and avoided losing pieces. Max can access each bag with ease, put them away comfortably and give us time to do chores while he works on puzzles one by one.

Wonderful!

Quote from Max

"When we was little dad, we used to like Fireman Sam as well". I didn't see you there kid, but if you must know, I watched Thomas the Tank Engine, Thunderbirds and Noddy before Pokemon came along, I thought you knew me kid!

Well that was it, leave your comments and thoughts with Laura or you can hit me up on Twitter: @SJCastle_. I'll shake it up a little for next week, maybe even add a few more. I've got plenty to play with now with my new plan.

Have a great weekend!
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Fridad

Yessir, Fri Dad is back.

Fri Dad had another one of his unplanned vacations last week, but that's okay because I was inspired to write this little number whilse I was away.

As followers of Laura's blog will know, we took two young ladies to Summer In The City 2014. If you don't follow Laura's blog, that's what we did. Summer In The City is a HUGE conventions for YouTube channel owners who vlog, make music, films, express hobbies and all sorts of stuff. All ages range in YouTubers, however, the fan base was a young group...mostly early teens.

Laura and I were given the responsibility of chaperoning these two 15/16 year old girls for the weekend so they could enjoy themselves and get all fangirly as everyone pretty much did.

I said to Laura the day before 'this is going to be easy. Max always needs our attention, all we gotta' do is...well nothing, they're almost adults.'.

Though so used to being hands on, we were ready to hit AutoPilot. How stupid we were to think so.

The whole weekend, we were separated. Yes, we knew that we would, 8,000 people is a lot of people to get lost in and amongst. As another persons parent, you don't think you'll be so concerned, but being given the responsibility you DO!

I can't think of enough times I spent in the queue talking to them about taking everyones number, making sure everyone used their phone little and made sure we had a meeting point.

I thought for certain we'd receive texts and calls saying their lost, someone stole something, something's gone missing or a potential fight might kick off between them over schedule clashes.

In the end, it was the complete reverse. I spent the whole time texting to see if they were okay, if they had eaten and if they needed anything. I wasn't overly concerned about the event as I knew little of the people their. I was too busy arranging taxi's to and from the venue, making sure everything else was fine with Laura.

We then hit disaster the following day when we got caught in heavy rain during the queue to get in. NO ONE WAS PREPARED FOR IT, especially me. I was wearing only a white tee on top, before the day begun everyone could naturally make the shape of my nipples with their cold, wet hands.

We had a lot of trouble making sure everyone had dried off, gotten dry clothes from the merch stand (needs must. I bought a tee I didn't particularly want, but whatever saved any nipple heckles).

We had problems making sure they had everything together from the overnight stay, making sure they kept fragile bits safe such as posters caught in the rain.

I remember at one point walking around with Laura who was pretty annoyed that it was hassle. That being said, the girls WERE well behaved and not a serious issue throughout the weekend.

Eventually we got ourselves home and had our son back in our desperate arms. We had missed the little man, even with his major hyper activity from too much sweets (thanks, Nan).

I remember laying in bed and realising something, you never really stop parenting and parenting gets no easier as the child at hand gets older. You always feel like you need to be on your toes about things and you remain paranoid that something WILL go wrong. Either way, parenting is a task done only by the passionate...and the slightly crazy.

That;s all for this weekend. Take the time to give your children a big hug and say that they're great fun at the age they are, because you'll grow together and learn more and more about each other and learn to love each stage (even when they get 'too cool' to love you).

Have a great weekend! 
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Fridad

Right Friday Followers, let's FriDad.

I've had one roller coaster of a week, more downs than ups and it's been tough. It's only now that I have really accepted that I'm in a sticky situation, which seems odd considering the situation I was in this Wednesday.



This Wednesday, I found a quiet moment with the family about to take a moment and post a video response on VoxPopMe (if you can, check it out I love it).
I used the nearest room, which was Max's and closed the door.
I posted two quick video responses then headed for the door.
Much to my surprise, the door was stuck. I was trying to turn the handle, but it wouldn't budge. Laura instantly rushed over and tried to open it, but couldn't.
After nearly 30 minutes of trying to unscrew the handle, force it open we had to call the fire brigade.
It took four firemen roughly ten minutes to pry the door open and push it open.

All the time this was happening I was calm. I was calm, because I realised something. Things were just right to be okay. I had no reason to panic, I was the one in danger, Max was safe and okay Laura was late for work, but everything was fine.
If the circumstances were different, I would have panicked a little more. What if Max was in there? What if I was in there and Max had no one? What if I was in there, Max was alone and I didn't have my phone?
That's the closest I've been in terrible trouble for...ages.

I truly believe that there are moments in life where you are thrown these little curve balls. We are given all sorts of trials and tribulations, and it's up to us to step up and behave the way we need to in order to resolve them. I feel that that incident I've been working towards, and I owe my patience all to parenting.

It's far too easy to snap and lose it whilst tired and weary. It's easy to give up (though, admittedly I'm working on it).

With practice, I've learned that my son relies on my toughness. Not physical, but mental toughness. He knows I mean business when I do and he knows that no matter what, I love him.

In doing so, I've been able to apply that patience in so many ways. Work, communication, writing and life opportunities.

Some day you'll face your locked room. Some of you may have faced one or two and many will face many locked rooms.

With confidence, you'll know not to panic, things will resolve, as long as you work at them.

That's all from me this weekend. Enjoy the weather and see you next week!



Sent from my iPhone
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FriDad (on a Saturday!)

Part 2 is here for you Fri Dadders gagging for more.
In the previous post I spoke about sharing tips and tricks for the benefit of others.
Since it’s been a blistering summer, I thought I’d share a current routine that’s doing very well right now.
As you are all aware it’s TOO HOT! Too hot to think, eat, drive or do cosplay. Children want to do EVERYTHING! The heat is keeping them awake, making them irritant and the lack of blackout curtains makes bedtime tough.
I came up with a solution that I’ve adhered to recently that made bedtime a set time and sleep time almost instant.
Okay, this routine starts from 5:30, roughly the time in which I feed Max his dinner. I make sure the dinner is light, there is plenty of liquid available and the dinner is quite juicy (soups, tomatoes, stew’s etc. all good).
I keep any potential desserts small. The last thing I need on my hands is a recharge.
Once tidying away and checking emails to see if anyone wants me as a scriptwriter (guess what the answer is so far) I pack a bag. The bag contains a bottle of water, a toy or two and an optional banana (bananas can help with dehydration).
At 7 o’clock (roughly the time CBeebies buggers off. I’m sorry, it’s a godsend for 5 minutes peace, but it’s treacherous) Max and I set off for the local park.
When we get there, all hell breaks loose. The temperatures have dropped, the park is empty and it’s time to play football Fireman Sam with a cuddly toy in tow. There I let Max drain all energy available, giving him water breaks and a snack if dinner didn’t quite cut it.
Around 8 o’clock it’s time to save Max lobbing the football from any other child’s head and go home. When we’re home I give him a quick wash off to avoid that sticky feeling he’s left with. A warm shower or bath raises the body temperature, opens the pores then drops the body’s temperature cooling him off.
Then it’s back to the original routine. Pyjama’s, book, blinds, bed. By then Max is in bed exhausted and by 8:30roughly it’s lights out! Now I can write FriDad in peace and attempt to write that script.
If you haven’t tried it, give it a go. Adapt it for yourselves and make it enjoyable for everyone involved.
There you have it folks. That’s my FriDad debt paid off for you all. I now need some water and a lie down. Until then…please let me go back to one for next weekend. Bye! 


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FriDad

Hello all, it’s Fridad. FriDad took a deviation last week with a few things popping up unexpectedly. So this week…get ready for it…DOUBLE FRIDAD!
Yes! That means half of you will be inundated with FriDad goodness, the latter a double torture. Oh well!

This post is 10 ways parenting is like Writing and 5 ways it REALLY ISN’T!. Be aware, I am referring to scriptwriting and my knowledge of writing, this isn’t an expert at the helm here.

1)      You get better at writing with practise: Writing is a long process that takes a lot of trial and error. Parenthood is a lot like this in which you learn on the job a lot what your child likes and dislikes. With time, you begin to be able to do it on autopilot and it baffles you when you look back and go…’what did I just do there?’

2)      A routine is valuable: Writers work best when they have a routine in place. A sense of structure so that they can work persistently to get the piece written. The same can be said of parenting. By setting routines for bed, dinner…heck a whole week. The operation goes smoothly with only minor mishaps.

3)      COFFEE IS NEEDED: This one needs no explanation. Surely.

4)      Writing groups is a great way to socialise: When in a writing group, you can pass your work into other’s hands, learn neat tips and tricks and just generally make friends doing something you love. With parenting, meeting and greeting others and reiterating the process, you can gain so much from doing so.

5)      Time away is important: Though you grind, focus and keep progressing as a writer, a mental break can recharge you and give you fresh eyes on your work. Vacations and nights out do exactly the same for mums and dads.

6)      Research can really help: As a writer, sometimes writing what you know just doesn’t work. By experiencing some things, learning about subjects and reading theories you grow a wealth of preparation for projects and the future. Baby books for pregnancy, parenting books and even things like One Born Every Minute are great starter points for mums and even unsure dads.

7)      Do it your way: Whatever happens, your project is your project. Criticisms are as you value them and you have to decide what is best for your work. As a parent, it’s your child and if you’re confident you know what’s best, you don’t need to hear someone testing you.

8)      Drinking is great, writing is great, but they DON’T MIX: The same applies with driving, reading, skiing, sewing and fracking.

9)      Work out how your project is going: It’s hard to know how to edit a script. It’s tough to kill your darling’s and directions in which your script can go don’t always leave you happiest. As a parent I know not every child, especially my own is ready for what you think they’re ready for. Remember, they have a conscience too and a personality. Let them express themselves as openly as possible…you’ll learn so much from them from doing so.

10)   It’s a passion and the more you put in, the greater it shows: You’re best work is always one you pour your heart into, the one you sneak away and plan for, the one you don’t stop talking about to people…now look at your child. That passion you throw in whether you spend all day at home, the mornings/ evenings you get as you swap jobs with your partner or occasionally at weekends shows when you show it to your children. You get out what you put in. Don’t stop doing it, they will be their very best if you do so.

AND NOW, the 5 NOTS!

1)      Your first is always your worst: Not true as a parent. I’m the first child and I’m the best child…right mum?...mum?...dad?...please?

2)      Writing is rewriting: Parenting is NOT reparenting, stop trying to reimagine your children!

3)      Plagiarism is criminal: Now, if a parent uses another parents technique or fashion sense or ideas…who cares? No parent has bothered patent pending anything they do. If you share it openly, it should be flattering someone wants to do it too. Copying and borrowing is fine, claiming it is sad and if you see it…who cares? Go watch the amazing things your kids can do and forget why it even bothered you.

4)       The coffee shop is a great place to write: Go ahead, take your child to a coffee shop. Let everyone see how great shared parenting is in that tiny café. The acoustics in there are phenomenal I bet.

5)      Drink, drink and more drink! We writers love to drink!: Yes I know writers love to drink, parents do as well, but…come on…we’ve covered this.

Well there we have it…the art of scriptwriting procrastination achieved again. Hey, I still like this gig so it’s fine.
Right well get ready for part 2 coming up on this double header.

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FriDad

FriDad Bomb! Hello readers...this community needs a nickname (all six of you).

It's fair to say that's a lie...it's only four. But lying is a sure sense of security right? It's false truth and deviation, but it's safe right.

It's as House expresses "everybody lies".

We lie to hide things, we lie to protect ourselves and we lie to our children. The difference you'll see in lying to children is it's for so many reasons.

Be honest, your parents dropped you some big, fat porky pies. 'Eat your carrots, you'll see in the dark', 'sitting too close to the tv gives you square eyes', 'if you don't clean your room, carpet sharks will grow in your carpet then try to eat you and circle you in your sleep'. I can honestly say it was well worth tidying my room last month...phew, no carpet sharks for me.

So I wanted to reflect a little. Is it fair parents lie?

Well, it depends on the lie. Lies have different ramifications, but a lot of lies I find are for the best.

Little white lies are safe. The carrot lies etc. are great to encourage good habits. Kids respect what their parents say, even when you think they're 'too authoritative'. It's not wrong or unfair, sure the kids will cotton on soon enough, but for starters it's a great way to offer veg without forcing it into their mouths.

There are lies you tell to scare your children with. They can be stories that you tell that come with morals. This is fair, I have no problem with these. Children do struggle to listen to straight forward advice. A little fear and respect goes a long way until they can comprehend.

The death of a pet I think is important. Telling children that the fish can change colour, they've run away avoids having to give the speech about death which kids can't really fathom. Unless you think it's something they can handle, carry on.

Little lies to believe in things Father Christmas, Easter, Tooth Fairy is a little bit messed up I believe. I understand that it adds to the 'magic' and yes it is fun, but one slip and see the look on their sweet faces. It's hard to avoid, because it's so fun but it's dangerous, because you all remember trying to catch your parents out. One benefit is adjusting behaviour for Father Christmas, it works for us.

My favourite one is the benefit for the parent. I recall a day when a boy who lived down my old street called Jamie moved in and he was a mouthful. He had two younger brothers and they were loud. I remember close to dinner time he would go out with his brothers with clipboards and pens and writing down all the car registrations around the block.
I went up to him and asked what he was doing. He told me that his mum thought it was important to do this for her before dinner. It was only recently that I kind of had an idea what his mum was up to. Free time is tough to come by, so things like this, which are harmless aren't bad. Obviously, as long as it's done appropriately.

So, in conclusion I truly believe that lies are valuable. We lie to our kids a bunch and sometimes it can be quite cruel. Sure, there are consequences if you get caught, but if only they could understand that they were done with the best intentions, they will copy us when they choose parenthood...just like we did.

That conclude FriDad. Have a great week or the carpet sharks will be after you I swear to god. Also, if you have a great lie please share it.
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Fridad

FriDad ahoy!

Here I am again folks...on my fiancées blog...on a Friday...rather than a blog of my own.

I started off with that sentence to give you an idea of the topic that I will be posting about today.

I have since received 2 questions regarding my posts.

The first one was: Scott, you're so super hunky. Gosh I really like your writing style and I think you'll become a writer for the greatest of films we've ever seen. Please can you come visit?...I have pizza and cider at your disposal...tell me your WHOLE LIFE STORY!

...Okay that one wasn't real. For the record, it's prawn toast with sweet chilli sauce and beer that I enjoy.

The actual question I received, was: You have so many different things to say in your blog post. How come you don't have a blog post of your own?

...that didn't happen either. I guess I just wanted to look like people talk to me who aren't 3 and a half years old or called Max.

Nevertheless, I can answer this question, why don't I use my own blog?

Well, it's quite simple...I don't enjoy writing blogs.

There I said it! Blog writing is not a true passion of mine. At least right now, I have nothing I want to throw into an open web page for the world to glare at.
I would want to blog about things that do interest me...NFL, scriptwriting (but not how to's etc.) but, currently my fixation is driven to other things.

I don't personally feel obligated to write about parenthood. Being a dad is awesome, don't get me wrong, but it's not an attribute I truly want to be remembered for.
Early on into parenthood it was what made me stand out. I was the goofy writer student with a kid. Soon I realised, it's not a talking point...it's a deterrent for other non parents. I felt slightly felt like female students avoided me not to catch 'the pregnant' (don't worry Mila Kunis, I don't say we're pregnant. Watching what Laura went through was serious stuff, my contribution was...minimal).
However, the more I thought about parenthood, the more I felt that parenthood is something I talk very little about. When I do, it's to tell people who are intrigued what I get up to...which happens rarely.
This isn't me telling you stop blogging about parenthood. By all means, every parent has a story, mine just isn't worth talking about. Not to be of interest anyway.

So why do I write on Laura's blog?

A few reasons.

One is, I truly support Laura's writing. She's passionate about it and she loves it. When she asked me about writing for the blog, I was a little skeptical at first (as the first blog I did suggests), but I've learnt to just get on with it.

But I thought you hated blog writing and that you had nothing to say?...well, I do have a few things to say. So when I do, I save them for these posts.

And finally, really to discipline myself to adhering to a deadline. I'm quite bad at deadlines for writing, but with someone on my case, it works a treat. With a little luck, I will be able to branch out and write what I like on a blog I can be arsed to do.

So there you have it. All of your questions answered...yes, I know none of you even asked...but hey, answers that question easily.

Until next week, enjoy yourselves and love each other.
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Fridad

FriDad ahoy!

Yes readers it's the weekend soon and it is time I take over for a weekly shout.

It's Father's Day this weekend and I wanted to take a moment to pay homage to Dadhood.

It's fair to say that no, fatherhood is not the hardest job out of both parents. I'm not here to address that.
However, it's fair that the role of a father is no stroll in the park.

For every dad who was there through pregnancy, read the books, went to every session and was caffeine filled on that late night trip to the hospital. Being pro-active and wanting to be involved isn't a knock on your prowess, it's a display of your dedication.

To every father who got to hold their child and was completely overcome with joy, that offered to do nappies to let your partner rest and looked a tit falling asleep in their own lunch and didn't want to go back to work. Your commitment is truly appreciated.

To every man who never lost his mind at every sleepless night, ear splitting cries, exploding nappies, ruined house wear, tantrums and children's TV. You do it for love and it shows.

To anyone who isn't ashamed to kiss their kid, look daft as they play with them...or just dance in general. Who go out with stains on their t shirt and still have toys in their car. It's not the thoughts people have of you, it's the memories you have that you can cherish.

Do spare a thought for children won't be sharing their Father's Day as they aren't there, no longer with them or maybe the dad isn't quite the role model as hoped.

Dads who do fight the good fight, take a day to step back and recognise just how awesome it is to be a dad and have a loving family. Make the most of your day Sunday, not the least.

Have a great Fathers Day and a great weekend.
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Fridad

Hello.

Would you believe it, I have actually posted on time. For the first time in ages!

There's been little I've been able to talk about dad wise, so I had to do a little thinking as to what would inspire my post.

I was pretty bummed out from recent news and plans etc. so I was snatching at something that would give me a lift.

I came across an old video that I watched not long ago.

http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=w-HYZv6HzAs

This man discuss a lot about self confidence and ways in which you can influence children to be uplifted.

I took the time to think about my previous attempts at parenting. Fatigue and pride (this is one that gets in the way of a lot of parents) lead us to snap and get aggravated.

Dr. Ivan Josef discusses about how you can make children respond without having to tell them off. He notes how direct feedback can lower their feelings.

I really took to this, I really started to think if Max deserved my hard side when he can be dealt with differently. Using examples for him to follow and praising things he does right have shown an improvement in behaviour and a closer bond with Max.

I must admit, it's not like I was in desperate need of help. I started to notice how I respond to bad behaviour and how my fatigue can make me rude and abrupt myself.

There is a sense of self confidence that rises in yourself because you did something that works.

His other point that he makes about your own self confidence is something that if you are a struggling parent could do to not let your esteem dip.

Do your best to remind yourself of your positive moments and stay persistent.

Hey, I can understand if you think I'm preaching. I'm not! This video has given me a little bit of perspective that has helped me out thoroughly. I wanted to share this link for those who might need it and to tell my own story of accomplishment, which I seldom do.

Anyway, please check it out if it interests you and be sure to link and share your own videos that keep you going.

Have a great weekend
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FriDad

Hello FriDay and hello FriDad.

This week, I'm following on from last weeks post about moving forward and following up goals for the future.

This week is about motivation, the drive to keep the dream alive. For some of you this post may mean little as drive doesn't need fuelling. I do feel though, for some parents especially first timers it can be tough to conjure.
When I first had Max I was so focused on being a dad, I didn't focus on much else. I was so busy trying to be the best dad I could I paid little attention to my life.
Returning to Uni. all I wanted to do was not fail, which was really the wrong attitude. I didn't fail my first year, so I needn't have worried.
Now out of Uni. and with no plans, I have to build from what I have.
So I'd like to give a little food for thought. If there is something you wish you could do or have a new goal then here are a few ideas to get you motivated:

Put a plan together: Not every dream is ready for take off, it needs a direction, sacrifices and a time scale. Spend a little time with yourself and think about where you are, where you want to be and find out makes you want to change circumstances. Once you have figured the best way for you to get there, write it down. Keep it to yourself though, it's okay to talk about it after, but don't add pressure from expectations or seeking approval. The only approval you need is your own.

Keep at it: If the time scale has to be compromised, just chip away at it, any way you can. Progress needs to remain and saves procrastination. The progression will keep you fuelled. Don't quit either, results don't always show straight away but they will if you keep at it.

Reward accomplishments: the road is always tough and tiring. Give yourself a chance to recognise your successes.

Enjoy time away from work: Work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. When you're not working, take the time to keep enthusiastic. Enjoy time with the kids, family and friends. If you bog yourself down and focus too hard, it can wear you out.

And most importantly...

Believe: Believe it's going to happen, believe it can be done, believe that it is achievable. You may be the only person cheering yourself on, some may know what you're up to and tell you what they think, but it's your life. You know the benefits, you know what will be best. By all means heed valuable advice, but, ignore the bullshit. You can get there and you will. Sometimes heeding your own advice can be difficult (for me it is) but it's doable.

I wish you all the best on your journeys. Feel free to add your own thoughts and advice.
Enjoy your bank holiday weekends!
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Fridad

Hello FriDad gang, hope your week has been great and Easter hasn't driven you mad with chocolate fuelled children.

I've really little to talk about this week.
This is normally the time I have something funny to say or interesting to say, but I've got to tell you that I've had a lot on my mind. The overthinking and what not has left little for me to talk about parent wise.

I guess in someways, especially if you're younger that parenting can be a bit like that.

When I first found out I was going to be a parent, I had a real project on my hands with Laura. We had places to buy, things to put in place and a serious hardship to prepare for that I had a lot to talk about.

When Max came I had my next big task, I had to face reality as a dad. It was great starting out, a really exciting time learning all the new things whilst doing everything half tired. I had a lot of figuring out and personal planning to arrange.

My next mountain was juggling work with studies at University and parenthood. By no means am I comparing my experience to others and making it seem as if I drew the short straw. I'm not the least fortunate, but knowing my 'backstory' (informal scripty term POW!) I would consider myself the boy least likely to.

Now I'm here. I graduated with the grade I set out to prior to having Max, I have a job still and now my son is self sufficient. I have conquered my biggest life mountain so far. But now, as graduates discover swiftly is I'm now left with one question: So, what next?

It seems crazy that happily ever after is used in story and we believe we can achieve our own. But I've discovered as many before me will tell you, there's no true comfort.

The comfort you desire or comfort you have designed can be very easily be disrupted making it difficult to salvage.
A phrase I can only describe it as (if it's not patented, I'm doing it now!) comfort is over the mountain that's next.
You're not ready to rest until it is all said and done.

Well, I've found it tough to tackle my latest mountain, but I think the obvious thing or project is to point my life into the direction that brings us closer to comfort.
Plenty of different directions it can go and of course there's mountain once I've conquered this, but I know I'll look forward to it.

So returning to my point, which in truth doesn't necessarily identify with young parents, but with parents in general is don't stop looking for your next mountain and how you're going to overcome it. It can be a huge life change or little bits and bobs that inconvenience life. Note it, plan it then tackle it. You'll either succeed or find a new solution.

Well, that was great to discuss. I'll follow up on this discussion with a relevant topic next FriDad. Until next time, enjoy your weekend.
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FriDad

Hello FriDad, it's actually good FriDad.

This week has been a tiring one for me, I got a fair taste of full time parenthood.

Don't get me wrong, it was great spending hard quality time and making plans for fun days out. What took away from it, personally was time and energy to focus on the one thing that niggles and eats at me every night. Writing.

If Laura hasn't explained I aspire to become a script writer. I always enjoyed writing and making stories up as a child, pursued acting then decided I want to give writing a shot at 19.

Since then I graduated University with a scriptwriting degree and have written sketches for radio and a short film for someone's final major project (big boasting point: starring a girl who was in Snow White and the Huntsmen).

However, since stepping out of University, there has only been one real agenda: survive.

Money ran stupidly low, it was our luck the car suffered issues, we had to pay for full time child care and well...writing doesn't lead to a 9-5 job. That career is sale after sale, even then that's spattered with rejections etc.

I've gone from having plenty of writing time to having little time to focus. As was the case this week.

The part that I guess hurts is the free fall has left me feeling if it's worth chasing when the main goal is to build our lives in time for Max to go to school,

Returning to this week. There are opportunities for me to write for competitions and the BBC. They are approaching fast and I've simply not rewritten my story.

I put myself in a position where I said: do I hinder writing and give Max my full attention or do I write whilst Max is here and squander the chance to have some quality time he deserves.

I guess it's tough when you have to compromise, but I feel I made the decision that was fair.

Ultimately, it was a sacrifice and procrastination has worn me down. This is the part in a script they call the 'all is lost' moment. Watch back Disney films and you'll see it, it's near the end.

However, as cruddy as I feel for missing out on writing I was dealt a lifeline. Laura.

She came home Wednesday to see me moping on the sofa, not even looking at the tons of notes I have and plans for a new draft. She ran over and offered me some encouragement. Something to fuel the fire she knows I have.
It's been tough when a lot of times Laura and I rely on one another, but the great thing is even though we've not known each other a serious amount of time, we support each other.

I'm glad to say I'm revitalised and refreshed from the chat we have. Plenty of motivation for the deadline.

To conclude, I truly admire single parents that don't have that helping hand or stay at home parents with little to work with. I learnt it's no easy task and it can tire you. What I hope is there are those that have dreams and desires for the future. I hope that they keep hem in sight and find ways to work towards them everyday regardless.

Well, I guess there's little use talking about it now. Time to get grinding. Thanks for listening to FriDad. Have a great weekend. Get those dreams alive...I'm procrastinating again...bye!
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Fridad

Fridad has returned. I hope your week was a dandy.

This weeks was decimate. It was a heck of a quiet one. We felt the pinch this week, so we took it easy...maybe a little too easy.



One person that was on fire was Max...not literally! I don't want anyone to think any sort of arson was involved.

I really wanted to write something thought provoking rather than comical, but FriDad wouldn't be quite the same would it. Next week can be though.

Until then I want to share what I can only describe as humdingers that Max came out with.

Without further ado, here is a prime example that kids can also be entertainment:

(After watching Baby's Day Out)
Me: Max want do you want to do now?
Max: Kick mummy in the willy.
Me: Mummy doesn't have a willy.
Max: Yes she does!
Me:...

(An air ambulance lands unexpectedly just outside the flat)
Max: Oh, Nan's home.

(Max is asleep)
Me: (To Siri) Define diatribe.
Siri: Definition a thunderous verbal attack.
(Max awakens)
Max: The phones talking nonsense!

(Max is in the bath. He looks down and spots his genitals)
Max: What's these?
Me: They're your balls, son.
Max: Oh...did you buy them for me?
(Commence endless laughter)

(Max is in a world of his own)
Max: Daddy, I want a beard.
Me: I beg your pardon.
Max: I want a beard just like you.
Me: But I don't have a beard buddy. I have bristles, do you want bristles too?
Max: I want a beard now!
Me: You have a long time till you have a beard.
Max: You love beard!
Me: Do I?
Max: Yes it's in the fridge
(It finally hits me)
Me: Oh you mean beer!
Max: Yes! Beer!
Me: Oh I understand now...no you're not having a beer.
(Commence torturous wailing...because my son knows my drinking habits)

Feel free to share all of your humdingers here. Enjoy your weekend!
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Sun Dad (kinda)

A happy belated Sun Dad folks.

Preparation and busyness has set back Fri Dad, unlike Laura I pick my spot usually close to FriDad or FriDad night.

This weekend I'm in London or as I call it free. I'm free of the kid police to enjoy myself as my dad takes care of the sprog. By all means, please don't think I take that for granted. I'm lucky I have parents and parent in laws etc. available to give a helping hand to get some free time.

The fact I referred to Max as the kid police is the topic for the day. Let's throw in a situation that would send shivers down a parents spine.

What if children called the shots.

In most cases, they do. Their determination and expectations lead them to be demanding and set in their mind as to how they want the world to work. For one I understand it, everything in the world is new to them. The more they can be stimulated and more they can experience the better they feel about life.
But, let's give them complete rule of the roost. All the rules, all the authority and cannot be outspoken.
What would the world look like. I haven't got the time to list them all, but let's shed some light on what we'd have to expect.

Personal slavery: That's right. We've abolished slavery and prohibit it, but it's one that would rear it's ugly head. You become the personal chauffeur, chef, chore completer and any other slave like job you can think of.
Forget your job, there is no job anymore. This is what you do now.

Pay abolished: This would have some advantages. Some children don't truly understand the concept of wages, tax, debt and inflation.
They don't understand who gets the money, where it comes from and what earns you money...except if the tooth fairy is about.
With this, you are given an unlimited amount of money. By having this, you can provide whatever their needs are. No more 'can't go on the Bob the Builder ride' or 'can't afford those sweets'. It's all capable. Prepare to fill your schedule with trips and shopping sprees. They will never end.

NO EARLY NIGHTS!: Forget 'em. Your free time has gone, hope you like coffee or red bull. You're gonna' need it FOREVER!

Sweets at dinner: Really? You couldn't figure that out yourself.

Children's tv 24 hours: This one hurts. All the great TV shows exist no more. Move over Broadchurch, the real mystery show is Rastamouse. Bye bye Breaking Bad, the only the who knocks is Justin/ Mr. Tumble (I'd watch that if Justin's House was a harbinger of pure drug dealing).

And also...

Infinite wisdom: School becomes a social event, the only people they need to ask questions about everything in the world is you, the all knowing and impeccable answerer of the question 'why?'. You are now a modern day Descartes, philosophy is irrelevant. Theories and perceptions don't hold up at all, just fact exists.

If you can envisage that world. Chuck in your horrors or blessings. But before you spin yourself into a whirlwind of thoughts, I hope you had a good weekend and see you again next week.
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